One of my favorite John Mellencamp songs:
I need A Lover that won't drive me crazy
I Need A Lover that won't drive me mad
I Need A Lover that won't drive me crazy
I Need A Lover that won't drive me crazy
Someone to thrill me, and then go away
I Need A Lover that won't drive me crazy
Someone that knows the meaning of ah - Hey hit the highway
Well I've been walking the streets in the evening
Racing through this human jungle at night
I'm so confused, my mind is indifferent
Hey - I'm so weak, won't someone shut out that light
Electricity runs thru the video
And I watch from this hole I call home
And all the stonies that are dancin' to the radio
I got the world calling me tonight on the phone
I Need A Lover that won't drive me crazy
I Need A Lover that won't drive me mad
I Need A Lover that won't drive me crazy
Someone that knows the meaning of ah - Hey hit the highway
Well I'm not wiped out by this poolroom life I'm livin'
But I'm gonna quit my job, and go to school, and head back home
Now I'm not asking to be loved or be forgiven
Hey - I just can't face shakin' in this bedroom one more night alone
I Need A Lover that won't drive me crazy
I Need A Lover that won't drive me mad
I Need A Lover that won't drive me crazy
Someone that knows the meaning of ah - Hey hit the highway
I Need A Lover that won't drive me crazy
Someone to thrill me, and then go away
I Need A Lover that won't drive me crazy
I Need A Lover that won't drive me crazy
I Need A Lover that won't drive me mad
I Need A Lover that won't drive me crazy
Someone that knows the meaning of ah - Hey hit the highway
Hmm... I don't know about John Mellencamp songs, but "The Night Santa Went Crazy" by Weird Al always reminds me of how you ... occasionally ... come across:
ReplyDeleteDown in the workshop all the elves were making toys
For the good Gentile girls and the good Gentile boys
When the boss busted in, nearly scared 'em half to death
Had a rifle in his hands and cheap whiskey on his breath
From his beard to his boots he was covered with ammo
Like a big fat drunk disgruntled Yuletide Rambo
And he smiled as he said with a twinkle in his eye
"Merry Christmas to all - now you're all gonna die!"
The night Santa went crazy
The night Saint Nick went insane
Realized he'd been getting the wrong deal
Somethin' finally must've snapped in his brain
Well, the workshop is gone now, he decided to bomb it
Everywhere you'll find pieces of Cupid and Comet
And he tied up his helpers, and he held the elves hostage
And he ground up poor Rudolph into reindeer sausage
He got Dancer and Prancer with an old German Luger
And he slashed up Dasher just like Freddy Krueger
And he picked up a flamethrower and he barbecued Blitzen
And he took a big bite and said "It tastes just like chicken!"
The night Santa went crazy
The night Kris Kringle went nuts
Now, ya can't hardly walk around the North Pole
Without steppin' in reindeer guts
There's the National Guard and the FBI
There's a van from the Eyewitness News
In a helicopter circlin' 'round in the sky
And the bullets are flying the body count's rising
And everyone’s dying to know -"Oh Santa, why?"
My, my, my, my, my, my - you used to be such a jolly guy.
Yes Virginia, now Santa's doing time
In a Federal prison for his infamous crime
Hey little friend now, don't you cry no more tears
He'll be out on good behavior in seven hundred more years.
But now Vixen's in therapy and Donner's still nervous
And the elves all got jobs working for the postal service
And they say Mrs. Claus she's on the phone every night
With a lawyer negotiating the movie rights. (They talk about)
The night Santa went crazy
The night Saint Nicholas flipped
Broke his back for some milk and cookies
Sounds to me like he was tired of getting gypped
Whoa, The night Santa went crazy
The night Saint Nick went insane
Realized he'd been gettin' the wrong deal
Somethin' finally must've snapped in his brain
Whoa, somethin' finally must've snapped in his brain
Tell ya, somethin' finally must've snapped in his brain.
Cap'n, who you kidding? Judging from this Blog, you don't even get any FIRST dates!
ReplyDeleteFeline companions aside, of course.
ReplyDelete@... Is it really me or because I am a Republican that you picture me shooting people, blowing up stuff and generally raising hell?
ReplyDelete@ Anon: Now, that was just mean! True, of course, but still mean!
LOL, I really am referring to the "we don't owe them anything but death," "hopefully my cat will just electrocute herself," "I should just call security-snapping," "cheap whiskey on [your] breath" you, Captain. :) :) :)
ReplyDelete@CaptainK: Ack! No politics! (Sheesh, can't even follow his own rule, grumble and groan.)
ReplyDeleteI cannot speak for "...", but I wager its because of you. Let us see, a white beard, big belly, generally Santa-like demeanor ... with mood swings. Yep, you.
P.S. The "old German Luger" line was just a coincidentally bonus!
ReplyDelete@ ... I see your point. Just a minor correction, though: It's bourbon and it sure as hell ain't cheap!
ReplyDelete@ jwg "mood swings"? I don't think I have mood swings... I'm pretty much always cranky!